80s Time Warp

October 24, 2014 update: Yes, another taken and shortened from the old Russian invasion LiveJournal archive.

What is it with sports commentators? Is it the excitement of the big event that makes them commit linguistic crimes? Or are they chosen for their verbal incompetence? Regardless, here’s another dose of their unique vocabulary.

First up, David Coleman…
“The late start is due to the time.”
“We estimate, and this isn’t an estimation, that Greta Waitz is 80 second behind.”
“It’s a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs.”
(…and it’s obviously an advantage to your career if you can fit both feet in your mouth.)

And this from Murray Walker…
“Just under 10 seconds for Nigel Mansell – call it 9.5 seconds in round numbers.”
“The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical.”
“We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite.”
(Murray, why make following a simple sport like F1 very straight-forward when you could make it almost impenetrable?)

And from boxing…
“We haven’t had any more rain since it stopped raining.” – Harry Carpenter
“Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing – but none of them serious.” – Alan Minter
“I was in a no-win situation, so I’m glad that I won rather than lost.” – Frank Bruno

And the rest…
“We didn’t underestimate them, they were just a lot better than we thought.” – Bobby Robson (after England played Cameroon in the 1990 World Cup)
“Like a falling oak, David Seaman manages to change direction at the last minute.” – John Motson
“Mary Decker Slaney, the world’s greatest front runner. I shouldn’t be surprised to see her at the front.” – Ron Pickering
(She certainly wasn’t at the front during the 3000m race at the 1984 Olympics. Zola Budd made sure of that….)

There’ll be another selection soon….